"Come-a, Come-a, Come-a, Camelia... You come and go!"

Come-a, Come-a, Come-a, Camelia...

 My first Plein Air painting for the Abita Springs Show in Abita Springs, LA on April on the 21st-23rd... Three more on-site paintings to go.

                                                                          Copyright2023/ Ben Bensen III

"Wanna Read The Paper," He Asks?"

 Good "early morning shout out" Tuesday, y'all.

Tom Burns one of the many octogenarians that, on occasion, shows up at the opening bell and beats me with his buddy, Herb, to my favorite chair. It's a friendly competition... GRRRRRR!

The diminutive Tom, I'm told, is a retired judge which is maybe the reason he keeps it close to the vest. On this day, Herb did not show up so, Tom's hiding behind the newspaper, every now and then, taking a sip of his coffee. Nothing is said.

I guess, nothing needs to be!

Twenty minutes later, Tom gets up, gathers up the local newspaper and tosses it onto the table that separates us.

"Wanna read the paper," he asks.

"I'll just leave it here for you," he says as he moseys on over to the microwave oven to warm up his small cup of coffee.

As he's waiting for the microwave to do its thing, I venture to make a comment.

"You do that often, don't ya?"

He grabs his paper cup, pauses for a moment as he attaches the plastic top back onto his cup, and then, heads for the door, turns, smiles, and blithely says," I don't care for cold coffee!"

The newspaper is the St. Tammany Farmer and as I page though the different sections, I noticed an article that interested me.

About two months or so, Tee and I met a good friend, Peggy DesJardin, at a downtown grocery store. We stood out in the parking lot as she spoke of spearheading the building of a labyrinth in Covington for Lent.

There's lots of history behind labyrinths. The stories abound, but my knowledge extends only with artistic and graphic versions. Apparently, there's much more to it, but for the sake of this post, I just wanna thank Peggy for her tenacity and resolve in getting this approved and completed. Pretty cool...

Lately, there are many things that I say I'm gonna do, but don't!

Props to you, Peggy...

Third cup!

Copyright 2023/ Ben Bensen III

"S'what Happens Before My First Cup Of Coffee"...

 

Good "wishful thinking" Wednesday Morning, y'all.

S'what happens before my first cup...

I got a lot of stuff to do today, so I have to make a few promises to myself.

It's time to get TOUGH!

I promise to not stare out of windows and think about stupid things.

I promise to not listen to that German "do-wop" song I posted a while back.

I promise to tuck my shirt in my pants and keep it that way and wear socks.

I promise to not let hangnails ruin my day.

I promise to not open any tortilla chip bags, nor the really out-a-sight Dutch cheese which always leads to me opening another bottle of wine.

I promise to stay in the studio focused for at least one full hour.

I promise to drink more water, which means potty breaks to leave the studio!

I promise to not allow the birds to distract me.

I promise to not curse at my Mac, or lovely little pop ups reminding me that I'm a out of date loser!

I promise to not listen to the song,"Every One's Gone to the Moon" cuz it gets me down.

I promise to not let Joe Walsh's high energy have me "boogalooing" all over the house ( although that German do-wop post is pretty good!")

I promise to not watch MLB on the "telly". Nor PTI reruns.

I promise to stretch and do my "yogi" thing even though it hurts like hell.

I promise to not get depressed over the fact that "yogi" thing it hurts like hell.

I promise to not get upset when telemarketers hang up on me first!

I promise to not open the refrigerator door and stare into it.

I promise to ignore my mind when it reminds me of things I'm not getting done!

I promise to not spend the day waiting for Facebook to make my day.

( although that German do-wop post is a pretty close substitute!")

Did I mention drinking more water, which means more potty breaks!

I promise to use CS6 Photoshop, which I hate, instead of CS3 which I love.

And finally, I promise to not open any wine till it's five pm... somewhere!

No real coffee yet!

Copyright 2023/Ben Bensen III

"Could It Be, Could It Be!"

A 5"x 8.5" painting!

 Good "easing into" Sunday Morning, all bodies.

Well, it was another yucky, wet day three days ago with very little color, I felt, in my life. After all, the football season was gone. But, a little ray of sunshine came by to visit our bird feeder.

Through the kitchen nook I peered cautiously through the glass to analyze closer without scaring the bird. Closer and closer making no sudden moves… like reaching for one of the three binoculars which are always on the shelf just out of reach.

The size of the bird was bigger than a goldfinch, but smaller than a cardinal with an elongated head and a sharp narrow beak. I was too far behind the glass with the Venetian blinds to really get a better look. With a slight flinch, it was gone.

Replenishing my coffee cup, I sat at the kitchen table with my trusty laptop open for anything. A flash of blue caught my eye as our resident House Wren hopped atop and circled the birdbath looking for drowning insects. Another flash. It was too small to be one of those noisy and nosy bluejays. Could it be, could it be!

I decided to try, one more time, to attract a different variety of birds by purchasing some dried mealworms, and adding it to the feeder. What usually happens is the woodpeckers discard to the ground whatever isn’t a nut. The bluejays aren’t much better.

A decade ago, or so, I attempted to raise live mealworms and keep some in the refrigerator. I was pleasantly surprised that my wife didn’t mind, but disappointed that wherever I put them, the ants got to them before anything else did.

Another blue flash, but this time, the bird landed atop the feeder and was hitting on the mealworms big time. It was the male version of the bluebird… such a beautiful bird. Not moving a muscle, the bird I saw earlier in the morning was the female which now landed and joined in on the feast.

I read bluebirds can live from eight to ten years old, and we’ve had our box occupied for way past ten years. Now that I’ve got the couple’s attention, after all these years, I suspect that they or one of their siblings will drop by every day to entertain and amaze us with their “bluetifull” ways.

Peaceful Sunday Morning cup!

Copyright 2023/Ben Bensen III

"S'what Happens When I Stand In Line Too Long!"

Oh, the Angst!

Good “Sunday before the Super Bowl Sunday” Morning, all bodies.

My wife and I had a fun time yesterday at the WYES-TV Antiques Showcase where the experts were on hand to assess real value of your antiques. The event is not part of that PBS Monday night series, “Antiques Roadshow”. Which got me to thinking as I stood in line to have an Art Deco lamp appraised, how much fun it would be if I was dead, but returned to earth to hear an appraiser’s comments on one of my paintings that someone bought at a garage sale.

I say this because on that “Roadshow” series, the appraisers seem to know, personally, all of the historical styles and personalities and quirks of every artist that ever painted in a particular time frame. And naturally, the artist has long since passed away. His or her art is now valued at some ungodly price, and at times, for an ungodly piece of crap, aesthetically!

Kinda pisses me off.

Anyway, I also had a giggle or two with the thought of personally bringing one of my paintings, framed and signed, to “The Showcase” be appraised. What would they say to me in person not knowing that I’m the actual artist and that I am not yet dead!

Sometimes, I crack myself up!

So, let’s pretend it is one hundred years later and one of my pieces is being appraised.

Patron: “I don’t know. The owner said their mother owned the piece and had it framed and hung in the master bathroom for years.” Apparently, she felt ashamed to love the piece the way she did and didn’t want anyone to disparage or belittle her taste in art… Weird, huh?”

Appraiser: Well, sir, for all the abuse it may have received in that location, it is in good condition with no signs of water, humidity or damage from soap bubbles. In our investigations, we found that the mother only used Ivory Soap!

Patron: Wow… Really?

Appraiser: That’s correct, sir. You know Ivory Soap is still ninety-nine and forty-four one hundred percent pure!”

Patron: “Still?”

Appraiser: “Yes… Still!”

Appraiser: “Can you tell me how much you paid for it?”

Patron: “Yes, twenty five dollars and thirty-four cents! I asked the owner if he knew who the painter was, but he said he didn’t know.”

Appraiser: “Well, sir, I’d say you got a real bargain here… with or without this damaged, Bondo repaired and slightly discolored varnished frame. What we have here is a classic Ben Bensen III painting created in the late 1970’s during his deepest and darkest period as he struggled with his addiction to Hubig Pies.”

“It has never been proven that he mixed the lemon pie filling with titanium white and acrylic gesso, but our investigations into Ben’s palette, at that time, clearly shows the genius of doing so.”

Patron: “Gee!”

Appraiser: “Yes, indeed! You may notice that at this time the subjugation of his brush strokes is purely in line with his intense need to put aside and crush his demanding ego and lay prostrate amongst the paint. It was in this “humble” period that the painting you own in your hands for $25.00 was created.”

Patron: “Wow!”

Appraiser: “Yes, Indeed. Much later in his career, forced to change his style by his rejection of that gluten laden paint recipe, created a real comeback for the man. His “Under The Causeway” series of watercolors is a true triumph. Mixing salt water with fresh water from Bayou Chastaine changed the way many artists now work as well as a whole new way to fathom what we perceive as deep.

Patron: “Gee, that must be something to see.”

Appraiser: “Quite!” Just owning a print of one of the watercolors from the collection, could finance your kid’s education!”

Patron: “No kiddin’…”

Appraiser: I’m sure that you’d like to keep this undiscovered jewel as your own. But, should you decide, for any reason, to part with it, maybe, donate it as a museum piece for all to enjoy, you need to know the details. Personally, I’d appraised this marvelously historic painting at $250,000.00 and insure it for over $1,000,000.00.

Patron: “No way… no way! That’s amazing… that’s absolutely incredible,” he says slightly aghast at his good fortune, which is a hallmark staple of the show!

Appraiser: “Yes… Way!”

Patron: “Hey Honey, c’mere. You know that Louie Vuitton calf skin leather bikini you’ve always wanted? Buy it… and then, book that trip to the French Riviera we’ve always wanted to visit. We be rich, now!”

And, God bless that masochistic pie eating Ben Bensen III guy. What a sap for his art he was, though he did have exquisite taste! And bless, the garage owner that owned him and hasn’t got a clue… about art!”

Appraiser: Indeed…

It was a fun and informative morning and leaving with lagniappe like granola bars, donuts, coffee, finger sandwiches and mimosas, was a hit!

First cup!

Copyright 2023/ Ben BensenIII

"And Tee Got A Snazzy Black Gift Bag For Free!"

A Fashionable Ruana!

 Good "Twofer 2'sDay" morning, all bodies.

Let's just say that a girl friend suggested a "Ruana" for Therese for Christmas. She looked pretty nice in one she wore one cold morning a few weeks ago.

Never even heard of a Ruana... Kinda sounds like it's African safari wear.

Anyway, I found a few online that I thought would look good on Therese, but I rarely shop online. Okay, okay, this is a real long story that'll try to keep short.

Naturally, they wanna sell you other things to accommodate the look, but once I found one that I liked, I just decided to cut to the deal. I put my Ruana in the shopping basket, then notice options for delivery which come at a premium if you want it by Christmas. Then, "if you act now" we can gift wrap it for you for an additional discount price and still have it arrive in time to be put under the tree. And, if you purchase it with our credit card you can get and additional blah, blah, blah.

No, I thought once again, just let's get to the checkout.

Well, I couldn't find a way out of the shipping post in order to checkout. Frustrated with the entire process, I deleted the entire purchase and started the entire process over again, and then, over again... and over and over trying to pay for shipping and get to the checkout. When I finally did, I was buying four Ruanas at the discount price of $387.50 which included shipping and a gift wrapping.

WHA-A-A-AT?

I decided to delete the entire transaction completely and call the local store to see if they had the Ruana I was interested and at the same discounted price and for... help! And, they did!

Two days after putting the gift under the tree, I get a package at our front door, and in it is a Ruana in a beautiful gift wrapped bag. Having made sure that Therese liked the shawl, I told her the whole story about now having two Ruanas.

So, yesterday, we returned the one I purchased online to the store. I told the salesperson as best as I could about the entire process. I tried to cut it short, but I think the woman was actually intrigued with my hair raising tale. She's probably heard it all before, but not from a guy.

I opened the box and presented the Ruana still gift wrapped in snazzy black bag which, being a guy, could care less about saving the bag... but Therese did.

And, so did the salesperson who stated that I paid for it as part of the deal and that I/we should keep it.

The woman and Therese tried in vain to open the snazzy bag without recking the bag.

"I hate to cut the strap to open the bag and get the shawl out of the bag," the salesperson said.

"Well, you've got the fingernails to get whatever and wherever the knot is," I said.

Tee tried again, but no luck. Losing patience with the whole experience, I just grabbed one of the loops and pulled real hard. II figured it was like a sweatsuit pair of pants where the string tie got tangled. One more assertive pull and... voila!

Now, everyone was happy. The salesperson got a new Ruana to put on the rack, I got rid of the whole embarrassing situation, and Tee got a snazzy black gift bag for free.

Uh... Merry Christmas?

Copyright 2022/ Ben Bensen III

"Ben's First Law Of Storage!"

Hook On A Feeling?

 Good "totally mystified" Thursday Morning, all bodies.

Yesterday, after complimenting her about her Christmas decorating, I expressed my frustration to a friend, Karen Kuchar, about spending, at least, an hour or so searching for our tin of ornament hooks, and in that post I said, "Watch what happens...We will schlep to the Dollar Store to buy some more hooks, and the "forever lost" box will show up sometime next year!"

Well, it didn't take that long!

After we bought two pack of hooks, and found the old box, we decided to pack it all in till later, and watch two Christmas Carol movies, the one with George Scott and the other one with Albert Finney. Though I fell asleep halfway through the Albert Finney one, I do prefer that one.

The sad part of this escapade was that the original tin of hooks was exactly where it is supposed to be... in a plastic tub full of ornaments!

Well, how 'bout that, folks!

Second cup at Giddy Up!

Copyright 2022/Ben Bensen III